Woman Called Out For Trying to Leave Toddler Niece Out of Disney Vacation

One of the debates that is a constant among Disney fans and guests is, “What’s the right age to bring a child to Disney World?” Some people bring infants because they love the parks and want to share that love with their babies. Others wait until the child is old enough to make some core memories as they meet characters and ride attractions like Dumbo. Then, there are some who won’t bring their children until they are old enough to hopefully avoid tired meltdowns.

Traveling to a place like Disney World with a toddler is always a risk. It can be sensory overload combined with the ultimate sugar rush. How many of you have visited Disney and have seen one of those dreaded midday meltdowns?

Well, one Redditor didn’t really want to deal with that, so she suggested leaving her four-year-old niece home while she went to Disney World with the child’s mother. That doesn’t seem too problematic. Until she mentioned that she wanted to bring her other niece — the four-year-old’s older sister — along on the trip.

Her suggestion lead to a fight with her sister and now has the woman wondering, is she in the wrong? She decided to ask people on the popular Reddit forum, Am I the A**hole to find out.

My sister went to Disney World with her husband and two daughters…let’s call them Milly and Mara. Milly and Mara are 7 and 4yo respectively. They had so much fun my sister asked if the two of us could go for my birthday in a few months.

I said sure but we should bring her older daughter, Milly, along because she’s incredibly well behaved and loves Disney World above all things. I felt it would be an AH move to go without her since she would enjoy it more than both of us combined. My sister said she couldn’t do that because, while she’d feel like an AH going without Milly, she would feel like an even bigger AH taking Milly and leaving Mara behind. She said if Mara ever found out she would feel betrayed.

The thing is, during their trip, Milly had the time of her life and was well behaved as usual. Mara also had fun (mainly at the hotel pool) but she is prone to tantrums and not only did she have multiple fits, she refused to go on about 90% of the rides because she was afraid (of the dark, of enclosed spaces, of loud noises, etc.). Of course, this probably isn’t all too unusual for a 4yo. But my sister and her husband had to take turns missing rides so one of them could sit with Mara each time she didn’t want to go on one.

When my sister and I go I would like us to be able to ride whatever we please. Milly won’t impede that goal, but Mara would.

Plus I would genuinely enjoy having Milly there. She is hilarious and makes such outings fun. Frankly I would feel like an AH going without her.

So AITA for my suggestion that we should take Milly and leave Mara with her dad?

EDIT: I know I sound like I favor Milly here but I truly adore both girls. It’s just that one of them can tolerate waiting in a long line, and even make it fun, while the other does better in more structured/less crowded settings (Mara, for example, is a delight when playing board games). I just wanted to clarify that I really do love them equally.

AITA for suggesting we leave my 4yo niece home when we go to Disney World?
byu/_hootyowlscissors inAmItheAsshole

Related: Man Abandons Wife at Disney Park After She Couldn’t Just “Let It Go”

Redditors were overwhelmingly against the woman. Many commented that the 4-year-old is old enough to remember that her aunt purposefully wanted to leave her at home while taking her older sister to an amazing place like Disney World. That memory could lead to some serious, lasting problems.

This. My mother went to Disneyland with my brother, and left me and my sisters at home with Grandma. I still remember feeling extremely left out and unwanted even though it was over 30 years ago.

Related: AITA? Woman Refuses to Take Disney Adult Sister on Magical Vacation

Others wondered why the woman would bring the children into the conversation at all. It sounded as though the Redditor’s sister just wanted to have time at the parks without any children, so they could do whatever they wanted.

YTA – This was just supposed to be a trip for you and your sister, yes? Then don’t involve the kids at all! By telling your sister to bring one girl and not the other, you’re sending a message even if you don’t mean to. Mara will feel there’s something wrong with her because her sister was invited to a fun birthday party with her mom and aunt/uncle, but she wasn’t.

You’’re creating a problem and a wedge that don’t need to exist. Just have the outing with your sister. If you want to spend time with Milly at the park, go another time when the whole family can enjoy it.

The Redditor talked about the four-year-old’s behavior and said that it seemed normal, but some thought that she didn’t fully grasp exactly what it means to be a toddler at Disney World.

YTA. First of all, Mara acted very much like a normal 4 year old on the trip. Your post seems to imply that Mara was being bad or a annoyance, but not wanting to go on intense or scary rides is a totally normal thing for a four year old. And sometimes having a meltdown in a crowded, unfamiliar place is totally normal for a four year old. When you take your very young child to an amusement park, you sign on for those things.

Second, four years old is old enough to know when you’re being excluded. You want Mara to sit at home, knowing her sister is out having fun with her mom and aunt? Because that’s what would happen. Its also a great way to start breeding resentment between sisters.

Either take both girls or don’t take either. I’m sure there’s a way to frame it to Milly that its a special trip for you and her mom. It is way more fair for both girls to be disappointed, then for one girl to get a super awesome trip and the other girl to get nothing.

If you are going to travel to Walt Disney World Resort with a young child, there are several things that you can do to make your vacation more magical for both you and your child.

Nap/Relaxation times are key: Disney World is a lot to take in. Between the four theme parks, two water parks, miniature golf courses, and Disney Springs, there is so much for your toddler to see and do. All of that can be overwhelming and exhausting. It is a good idea to take time during the day to head back to your hotel if you can. Let your little one nap, take a dip in the pool, and just relax. Then you can head back to the parks, ready to enjoy the evening.

Watch the sugar intake: One of the best parts about Walt Disney World is all the great food that you can enjoy while you are there. Disney World has so much more than regular theme park food, and that includes a ton of sweet treats. Allowing your kids to enjoy things they wouldn’t normally have access to is always fun. However, plying them with sugar will only lead to an enormous sugar crash and possible meltdown.

Disney also offers a ton of toddler-friendly snacks, including Mickey-shaped Goldfish crackers, freeze-dried apples, veggie chips, and bags of grapes.

Do one park at a time: As you get older, Park Hopping becomes an exciting option. Jumping from park to park to enjoy your favorite attractions can lead to some really memorable days. However, when you have toddlers, it can be a lot. It may be best for your family if you can take your time and just enjoy one park per day. That can save you from rushing around and taking your toddler along for the ride.

Visiting Disney World with a toddler can be a lot of fun for everyone! Don’t discount them just because they are young!

Do you think the woman was in the wrong? Would you leave a toddler at home while you took an older child to Disney World? Let us know in the comments!